We all have it, right there in a small, dark corner of our brain: The Bastard.
The Mean One.
The one that tells us we are not good enough. We aren't doing enough, making enough money, enough effort, that our achievements aren't enough, that our goals are unrealistic dreams, that we aren't enough smart, or strong, or beautiful, or interesting. That we don't belong. That we'll never make it.
It pops out when we start doubting ourselves, when we had a hard day at work, when we had a fight with our partner, when we are scared or a bit confused.
For some of us it's the voice of our mothers. For some, it's our fathers. Or elder brothers and sisters picking on us. Or the kid that used to bully us when we where children. Or the teacher that just didn't like us. For some it's simply our own voice.
But we all have it. Sometimes we manage to get rid of it. We recognize her, lurking about when we are most troubled, whispering venom in our ears, and we tell her to go away: "Not today, thank you very much, I don't need you, go bother someone else".
Sometimes we manage to keep her shut for so long we might even illude ourselves that we got rid or her for good.
But she is never truly gone. She was just waiting for the right time to come out. Then, we make the mistake of doubting ourselves again and there she is.
You can hear her hissing in the back of your head: "Have you missed me?"
"Little Bastard In My Head" is the second single of my upcoming album, another song born from the collaboration with dear friend and talented sound engineer Omer Shuster (
www.omershuster.com).
released December 17, 2020
Music: Sigal Chameides
Lyrics: Sigal Chameides
Musical Production: Omer Shuster
Mixing: Omer Shuster
Mastering: Yoram Vazan
Recording: Omer Shuster
Artwork: Meital Maor